Monday, February 18, 2013

Trying again (3rd time). Pros/cons to announcing 1st trimester

Fast forward to September 2012
Baby making trial #3

My husband can just look at me when I am ovulating and I get pregnant. I know this is not the case with some people, but we have never had a problem getting pregnant...they just don't want to "stick".

So, the end of September, 2012, we tried again and got pregnant...we told no one.
This time, the fertility doctor wanted to keep an even closer eye on my pregnancy. I had my first ultrasound at 6 weeks where we saw the exciting! They printed us a picture to take with us and scheduled another ultrasound for 2 weeks later (8 weeks). I began progesterone suppositories, prenatal vitamins, and a baby aspirin to guard against any clotting issues that may have previously been a factor. "Morning sickness" showed it's face again, only this time, I welcomed was the ONLY sign I had that I was pregnant.

8 week check up and hubby had to work a new job so he wasn't able to make it to the appointment. Ultrasound exam went well and baby not only had a heartbeat, but was wiggling around. Smiling & crying, I shared my ultrasound pictures with my husband immediately because baby was growing. 10 week check up was scheduled.

Then I started to feel "good" again...the morning sickness was subsiding and I was getting scared. I called my doctor the day before Thanksgiving and asked for another ultrasound because I felt that something was wrong...I shouldn't be feeling good. I also felt like a crazy person asking for an ultrasound because "I felt good"...really, who does that?! They got me right in at about 11am and the ultrasound tech was silent...stopping and freezing the images, taking pictures...and then she said it..."I'm having a hard time finding the heartbeat, I'm so sorry, let me get the doctor". It was happening again! I broke down on the exam table awaiting the doctor's arrival, knowing the outcome...another miscarriage. He confirmed it & found a doctor willing to do a D&C immediately (the day before Thanksgiving). We had picture frames poised to announce to our families we were expecting via ultrasound picture on Thanksgiving Day...another hope shattered.

What was worse, we not only had to break the news to our families that we WERE pregnant, but that I was having surgery the day before the holiday. Everyone has their pros & cons to announcing in the first trimester, this was one case that it would have been better to let family know prior to the devastating news of our loss.
The day OF surgery we had dinner with my husband's family for the holiday in the evening...I was in shock, so I got through it OK. The day AFTER surgery was Thanksgiving Day...dinner with my family and my worst day emotionally.

1 comment:

  1. Here from LFCA. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had my first daughter through IVF with no trouble, but then I've had 4 unexplained miscarriages since, several reaching into late in the first trimester. The unknowing and why is so hard. I'm so sorry for your losses.